Letter to My Future Adult Daughter. Learning How to Connect with Others September 2018

Hello again Jennavacia. Again you can not read any further as a kid. You can’t read this until you are of adult level emotion intelligence. This way you can fully clasp the scope of the following.

This letter is about how you are learning to get outside of your shyness & connect with potential new friends your age.

Here is one situation that tested your shyness. We was at playground after school one day and you were sad because you have no one to play with at the park. There was another young girl about your age (8 years old) who was also playing by herself. I noticed you kept looking over in her direction and so I told you, “why don’t you go over there and ask her if you want to play?” You nervously responded, ” i’m not sure, I am shy.” I was surprised by your answer as you are usually very friendly with adults by giving random compliments & asking for what you want. Anyway, I asked you, what if she is shy too? You sat quietly in thought gently swinging back & forth on the swing. I then reminded you of all the times you have brought smiles to others & times you made new friends out the blue. Finally I ask you, “what’s the worst that can happen if you ask her if you can play with her?” You responded with she could say “no.” I then said “is that so bad?” You didn’t respond you just leaped off the swing & confidently ran toward where the girl was sitting. Y’all sat by the mouth of the tallest slide & talked for a while. Thereafter y’all started running happily around the playground. After a while you noticed another girl playing by herself & you ask her to play with y’all. Now it was the 3 of y’all playing around. You even took charge of the trio & started suggesting games to play. I felt proud of you & watch in awe while you were enjoying yourself with your new friends. At the end of it all, you left happy & excited. Now here is another playground experience that didn’t have a similar result.

So on this day at the playground. I saw you approach these two kids playing in the playground and talk to him briefly and then walk away with you head just a little bit lower then when you first approached them. I then called you over out of curiosity and ask you what did you talk to them about? With disappointment that would sadden any dad’s heart, You told me that you introduce yourself to them and told them hi. You then ask if you can play with them & They told you, “no.” I looked at you with empathy & told you, “damn that must hurt but it would be ok.” You disagreed & whinny said “something must be wrong with me.” Caught off guard by your response, I took a moment to regather my thoughts. Thereafter, I warmly hugged you & confidently told you, “that I know it’s not you, maybe they just wanted to play by themselves. Anyway that means that now I get to tag you!” You look at me at first with surprise then with happiness as you bolted off. We chased each all around & up & down the playground while laughing in bliss. After we were both done for the day, I reminded you that sometimes we won’t get what we ask for & that is ok. At least when we ask, we have a 50/50 chance of getting what we ask for instead of not asking & not having any chance. Well, that’s it for this letter for you to reflect back on when you are all grown up. I love you always Jennavacia & look forward to continue to grow with you in life as your life-guide. Have a bless & wonderfully happy day.

With love always,

Your dad.

P.S

I will include a picture of our hands at the end of every letter. Just a random idea I had that I thought would be cool.

Leave a Reply